Writing back with answers..

Hey guys,
I started this blog as a teenager stuck in love. I wrote here successfully for a while.. garnered sooo much love and appreciation from the kindest people I never expected. I ALWAYS loved writing, I wrote diary entries every day, i wrote long birthday cards to my friends, edited my school magazine, composed so many speeches, wrote letters to Abhinav which were several pages long( which many years later I was told were a pain to read) and then I even started this blog.
Writing has always given me solace. It was my way to escape and have a piece of life to just myself. I always felt the happiest when I was writing, like I also felt when I fell in Love. I was so passionately engrossed in giving my relationship and my partner my all that I almost forgot my other love. Writing. This blog was a perfect mix of the two things I was most passionate about. Abhinav and my Pen, and so it made perfect sense to me back then.

When I started writing here, I knew nothing about blogging, it was just a way to secretly collect memories for him to read and as planned I wanted to keep it a surprise for him. But me being the love stuck puppy I was, met him one evening after ages and couldn’t control the surprise. In the next few minutes, we were browsing through my blog reading everything together. He was SURPRISED and so much… He even felt a sense of pride that every one of my readers had such good things to say to me. I was so happy and so was he. I asked him to write a comment for each post in my article and how he felt reading about that particular memory. He promised he will when he has the time.

Well, days passed and he knew about it all. He never had the time to comment and I started having less time to write myself too. I would have still made time if it wasn’t in the open. I never realized that the surprise part was the biggest motivation, I slowly lost interest and time kept passing. This was still a place I kept coming back when I was down to read and reread what the younger me felt and also wrote down so beautifully.
So many things happened. Most importantly we grew up, we took jobs stayed apart soooo many more days and finally a few years later… GOT MARRIED! ūüôā

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We have been a married couple now for three years and counting. The Love between us has grown every single day. The ways to express have changed. I now cook meals to make him feel special and he buys me flowers but deep down we’re still the same squabbling but passionate teenagers that we were, in college.
I have now taken writing as a profession, and do freelance work as and when I have time. The ever-shifting nature of Abhinav’s job has made it difficult for me to work constantly but I have no regrets. I get to do what I used to love and I am not complaining. Although there was something that kept me wondering all these years and something that I always wanted to know.

Unknowingly, through this blog, you all became a part of my life. I shared some of the silliest feelings that now make me cringe, with not just Abi but all of you too. And all this while when I opened my account every few months, I would see a visitor or two in a place that wasn’t updated for years. I wondered if I had abandoned you all if ANY of you ever wondered what happened to the silly teenager who wrote poems and letters and cringy posts about love? Did she ever tell him about the blog? Did he dump her? did they break up? did she move on?
I am a very curious person, and I realized I often still follow dead blogs of people I used to love at some point and I never get the answers I want if they leave midway. And even though I now understand so very well that people grow out of their blogs and they move on in life but the blog stays and some curious readers like me never get their closures. This very thought crossed my mind too, did any of you really wanted to know what happened to our story?
Well, today I decided I will write for even a single person who ‘if at all’ may have wondered what happened to me and Abhinav.

I hope it answers your curiosity.
Please comment below and let me know you thought about us in these years. Would give me immense joy to know I actually had a family that cared.
God bless.
Love,
Kalyani

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Why exactly does my heart race??

It is an underrated feeling I tell you.. To finally see someone you love the most in the world after being away for half a year. I could press rewind and play it a thousand times if I could, to just that one moment when your eyes meet.. And All the distance the pain the wait and anxiety just jumps out of the window. I thought I would be so happy to see him but turns out its not just happiness. It is smiles and tears and shivers and sweating palms and much more. . .

When I saw you today abi in that ink blue shirt walking out of gate number 2 slowly browsing through the crowd to find me, I suddenly felt my heart jump off from its seat and run out for its life like a maniac.. It started beating so fast that I thought It better calm down or I definitely will faint… In no time my palms were pink and sweaty and I didn’t know where I was… Continue reading

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Butterflies in my stomach.

I’ve been away from my blog for a little long this time. Not that I didn’t have anything to write… Life has been so eventful. But I couldn’t find words to describe some overwhelming experiences. Like the birth of a baby in the family or certain life changing decision or failing in an exam for which I worked hard for a year. Bitter sweet all at once.
But amidst all this my rock solid support was right there standing next to me helping me walk the twists and turns.. On the way I had so many beautiful memories too which I wanted to write about.. but then again I took time to finally gain back senses…
Anyways but… Why I have BUTTERFLIES in my stomach is another point…
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**MEMORY 9**

The first day went by Quite too fast… It was morning 8 one moment, and before I could blink, 8 at night… Why does time have to run so fast now and literally crawl when I wait for him… ūüė¶ ¬†Anyway, This memory is about the second day¬†of his visit.. We had finished doing all the important stuff he wanted to do… like meeting people and buying things¬†and some other random stuff… so now we had a full day to spend. So we go out with our friends Poonia and Khushbu for lunch.. So we hop on a ride and reach our¬†place. And while we were at the table eating and talking and catching him up with all the gossips he had missed all this time, Poonia starts his usual leg pulling with me. Continue reading

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Photos from Abi’s visit.

First day of Abi’s¬†visit went by rather fast. I took too much time to finally let the feeling sink… So In instalments I¬†would start giggling and burst into tears or hug him and make peace with my inner excitement. When he is around, I take more time to get ready. Silly! ¬†but it’s the only time I¬†feel my getting all dolled up makes sense Cause he’s around to see me.

HaHaHa…

Anyways, We went for a movie with our friends That night and these are a few pictures from that night. I know i am too late for all my blog posts. It’s been like months since his trip and i still haven’t written about it. But i will try and write more regularly now.

Love.

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